It is not that simple. Those pronouns are not one size fits all pronouns, there has to be an in between or more fluid pronoun that encompasses those who do not feel comfortable associating with them. I am a homosexual male, in my late twenties, that does not identify with either pronoun. I feel comfortable in my skin and confident in my male body, so it is not the case of transitioning to the opposite sex. Simply, I do not connect myself with “him” or “her” or “he” or “she”. The correlation of them with me is similar to someone scratching the nails across a chalkboard.
It is not out of convenience to feel this lack of identity, but that seems to be a comment that reappears in my life. I have heard from queer theorists that there are homosexual individuals that prefer to use they, them, their when clinging to a pronoun, but personally I feel like there is too much ambiguity in those pronouns. I am not trying to discredit anyone who feels comfortable associating with they, them, their, but just as an individual feels comfortable with those pronouns there are individuals who do not feel comfortable with them. Proper nouns seem to be what I most associate with, Levi and Sis, but when I explain this to people who ask my preference, they usually question Sis. Sis, an abbreviation for sister, is usually linked to a female, but in my case it was a nickname that was given to me—non-gender specific. Sis is simply a replacement for Levi and a name that coworkers feel comfortable calling me, instead of always referring to me as Levi.
Genderqueer, neutral: the identity of self, the chemical composition of self and how we interpret that. Beyond male and female we have come to know genderqueers, which may not identify with the body they are in. Genderqueers can be comfortable and know the biological body they were born with, but may not interpret their identity as such.
Androgynous, neutral: the outward expression of gender, which is based on stereotypical roles—primarily how one dresses, behaves, acts, and interacts. Masculinity and femininity seems to be such large terms when we think about the basics of them both. True expression of masculinity would mean a man performs the typical male job, dressed in clothing that would not blur the boundaries of male attire—meaning, “metrosexual” individuals could blur boundaries. Men that are truly masculine would behave and interact with other individuals according to standards regulated by society and historically dictated by men that have preceded them. So men, who swing their hips a little too much, daintily eat, openly express their emotions or make decisions with their emotions, or wonder what it would be like to strut around town in heels and tuck their penis to live for a moment as a woman, would cross the line of gender expression. This does not mean any man (or woman) who opens his (or her) mind to other possibilities would be gay or would be feminine, simply it means their gender expression could be more androgynous.
Personally, though I express myself primarily masculine (in the way I dress, though I do have both men and women clothing) and I was born a male, I do not associate with a masculinity or femininity. I am an Androgynous individual. Also, beyond the fact that I embody a male figure, I interpret my identity differently. I am a Genderqueer individual.